Tag Archives: Star Wars

A Vague Book

Earlier today, I looked up from the fifteen projects I was working on at my desk. I realized my viewpoint was a rather solid representation of my current conundrum. I know all the healthy things I should be eating and drinking (water, coffee, fruit), but dammit all, the only thing I can focus on is that Halloween candy lurking in the background. Also, I have a cough that rivals something out of The Exorcist. I’ll spare you the details, but that’s why the cough drop makes a random appearance.

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Early this week, I made some big changes. Ones I’m not ready to write a ton about here, but let’s just say my plans for future races have changed drastically. In a sense, I feel defeated and disappointed in myself. I hope others aren’t disappointed, because I do hope to redeem myself eventually. I have other things I need to focus on first, and I’m working through that. So in another sense, I am relieved. The pressure I was putting on myself was having the opposite effect I had hoped for. Rather than feeling motivated and determined like I used to in college when I’d save 20 page term papers until the night before they were due, I just felt…lost and like I was grabbing for something I’m just not ready to reach yet.

Well, enough “Vague-booking” from me. I’ll plan on expanding more another time.

Halloween has come and gone. November is here, and that means I’m legally allowed to play Christmas music in my home and car. (If you are someone who is morally opposed to this, I promise I’m not forcing it upon you. I am simply someone who basks in the glory of winter and Christmas and all the warmth and fuzzies that come from it. I love Christmas movies and snow and hot cocoa. I love trimming the tree and decorating my home until it looks like Christmas threw up in there. And I’m not going to apologize for it. I don’t ignore Thanksgiving (although, let’s not pretend Thanksgiving is based upon some warm and fuzzy event…) by any means. I just love the chance to celebrate winter and being with family and friends.

Where was I going with this? Oh, right. Halloween happened. I am hesitant to include myself in the picture below, because I am admittedly disappointed at the sight of myself in my costume. If you are overweight, maybe you understand that disappointment…when you *feel* like you look pretty good and then you see a photo of yourself that makes you want to crawl into a closet. Oh well. LJ thought I looked badass (not her word choice, but close enough), and I have to focus on that.

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My little Sith Lord had a delightful and sugar-filled day. She has such a full candy bucket, and I’ll be first to admit I’ve been sampling from it far too much this week. Especially as I am trying so very hard (for the millionth time) to be conscious of what I am consuming. I am so grossed out by the idea of sugar, and yet these rich confections still seem to keep jumping right into my mouth. Bastards.

For real, though. I have an awful cold this week. (Sorry to any of my coworkers reading this who have had to listen to my disgusting cough. Thanks for putting up with me and the massive amounts of Clorox wipes I’ve been using.) My whole body hurts from coughing, and I’m pretty sure I’ve pulled a few muscles. And this has led to me having a bit of a pity party because I can’t run without having a massive coughing attack. Which has led to some “DGAF” kind of moments when it comes to the ample amount of treats available. Goodness, I’m sure getting my use out of Urban Dictionary today.

I promise. It’s gonna get better. Did you hear that? Hold me accountable, plz and thx.

Wishing you and yours a happy Daylight Saving time. Ugh. Maybe “happy” is the wrong sentiment. Maybe “I hope we can get through this dark-all-the-time BS” is closer to the truth. Either way. Snuggle in. Have some cocoa. Watch a Christmas movie (or Thanksgiving movie or Halloween or just a movie, whatever). Enjoy yourself.

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Further clarity and subsequent extreme amounts of gratitude

I am grateful. After my last blog post, I received warm comments and messages from quite a few people. It validated the fact that this blog is a good, positive part of my life. It also validated something else for me. Almost everyone who reached out expressed sentiments of, “Me too!” whether they were agreeing with weight issues, mental health issues, or just dealing with a rocky road. I hear you all. I am thinking of you all (even those who didn’t comment but had one of those, “Me too!” moments). And I am thankful you are here with me.

As I find the days until WDW 2018 passing quickly, it reaffirms the fact that I need to be taking good care of myself and sticking to my training plan.

Sidenote: Disney released pics of the medals for WDW Marathon weekend, and they are beautiful. Oh, Lordy, I hope I finish so I can get that sweet piece of bling.

I need to stick to what I know works, and I know consistently taking care of myself works. I’ve taken on a new conquest: heart rate training. And I must say I am an absolute convert. I submitted a guest blog post to Minneapolis Running detailing my experiences with heart rate training so far, so I won’t bore you with too many details. And lucky me, they posted it! Please take a look at it if you get a chance, and leave some love. They’re a great group of runners, and I’m grateful they give me an opportunity to write on a bigger platform.

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I’m a planner, don’tcha know?

I will say I’m signed up through the Train Like A Mother club, and I heartily recommend it to anyone looking for a training plan + community + general awesomeness. I am #coachedandloved. And you know I can never pass up an opportunity to give a shoutout to the AMR crew.

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#momlife

Other than that, you haven’t missed too terribly much of my life while I’ve been on my unplanned hiatus. Been preparing for a Star Wars bday party in October, getting super duper excited for SW VIII, and vacation preparations (I make a mean scheduling spreadsheet, y’all), which will undoubtedly include many Star Wars events…I’ve been proudly flying my geek flag lately.

Okay. I guess my kiddo had her first day of preschool. And she got a big kid bed. And my dog wore a cute hat. But only a few things other than that happened.

This seems like a good place to include this post from BookRiot. It spoke to me. Because Star Wars totally is and totally always has been a girl thing, too:

As a woman in her mid-30s, watching A New Hope and Princess Leia was very different than watching it as a kid. THIS—this was a princess I could support. This was a self-rescuing, take-no-shit princess who blasted Stormtroopers, sassed the guys who were sent to rescue her, and did it all in a dress, with those fantastic buns intact, not a hair out of place. Carrie Fisher the actress was no less amazing—a sharp-tongued, razor-wit individual who was unapologetic and open about her struggles and worked tirelessly to get rid of the stigma of bipolar disorder and drug abuse. 

Preach.

Alright. I’ll leave you with that. Hoping to get into some semblance of a schedule soon along with details of my actual running life and book life and all the things I actually made this blog to document.

Again. Thank you, and I’m sending light and love to YOU.

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Ballerinas and Catsby and Wine-infused Coffee

And we meet again. On a Friday. Yay! Long weekend. Woo! Party time. Yeah!

Okay, that’s out of the way. This week was significantly less eventful on my end, and darnit, I like it that way. I still feel like I’m recovering from last week’s hustle and bustle.

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My baby had her first dance recitals this weekend. I was on stage with her (it was a “You & Me” class for caregivers and children, and though my role was minimal, I was still absolutely drained by the end of the weekend.

She did well, though. She smiled. She listened to me onstage (backstage was a different story). I guess that’s what matters. She loves to dance, and I think she’s going to be very good at it.

Other than that, the week has contained minimal excitement or activity. I’m re-framing my goals right now and really taking into consideration the things I need to do to achieve them.

Web-flavored Goodness

  • Sad news coming out of the running community. Gabe Proctor, a former NCAA champion, died by suicide last week. Nobody, regardless of their successes or kind heart or circumstances, is immune to depression and mental health issues. My thoughts have been with his family and friends.
  • I think I’ve referenced Mirna before in my blog. If I haven’t, I should have. Because this article made me say, “YUS, GIRL,” out loud as I was reading it.

“Lastly, I am beautiful. The entire running community is beautiful. And we determine that. Not you.”

  • Wine is good for you. We keep hearing this. So let’s skip the chit-chat, and I’ll break out the corkscrew. (Obligatory: moderation, people. Practice moderation.) (And sidenote, that article opened my eyes to the fact that there is now wine-infused coffee. This really blurs the structure of my day.)
  • One of my favorite cities on this planet held a memorial 5k. For a cat. Named Catsby. If it wasn’t dance recital weekend, I may have considered attending.
  • Yes. That’s all.

H’okay! I hope your long weekend is relaxing and fun and productive/unproductive (depending on what you want it to be) and filled with sparkles and rainbows and love. See you next week!

SHOP

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FriYAY

The sun is shining. The skies are blue. It’s Friday. The stars are aligned or the gods are finally happy with us or Mother Nature is just in a really damn good mood. Any way you cut it, today is beautiful in my neck of the woods, and I hope it’s great for you, too.

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Lunch breaks: deck, book, food. Win.

I found my way out on the beaten trail a couple of times this week, and I have a “race” tomorrow, if you can call it that. It’s a local event that sponsors local families dealing with serious illnesses. Always gives you the happy tingly feelings inside your heart to see so many community members getting together for a good cause. And it’s nice to have companions on my usual running paths!

This week has also provided opportunities to get outside as a family, something we never do enough of. I’m not sure if it’s easier or more difficult now that LJ is older, but she’s an active kiddo. So anything that helps tucker her out is good in my book.

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I’ve been really contemplating my relationship with food these past few weeks, as is evidenced by the great sugar fast of April 2017. (Y’know…by great, I mean 3 whole days sugar-free and a few more days mostly sugar-free.) It’s part of my unofficial “health reset” where I basically start building myself brick-by-brick again.

I’ve observed my behavior, and I am noticing a trend. If I start eating refined sugar earlier in the day, I want it all day. If I abstain for a while, I’m less likely to crave it and think about it. So whatever that’s worth…I don’t know.

This article seemed to hit at exactly the right time, though. It preaches kindness, and that’s what I need to remember.

The most important one that is helping me be kinder to myself every day? Find what works for you.

What works for you may not work for someone else—and that is okay. When it comes to food (and running and life…) it is okay to experiment. You may make a mistake. Something may not work for you. But, you’ll learn from it and move on.

This morning, I woke up, thought about the snacking I did after I got home from work last night, and my mind immediately thought, “You eat garbage. You are garbage.”

I caught myself. I was surprised, because I realized these are thoughts I have often but don’t often stop myself from having. This morning, I corrected myself: “You didn’t eat great last night. It satisfied some need or desire you had, even if it wasn’t the healthiest way to do it. Today will be better, starting…now.”

I didn’t 100% believe myself, but I believe there’s some merit to the phrase “Fake it ’til you make it.”

Well, before I pack up and head out for the weekend, I’d be remiss if I didn’t wish you a belated happy Star Wars Day.

Here’s my little Wookiee with her Wookiee hair and her Wookiee shirt. And my dog, because…Chewbarka.

SHOP

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1/21/17: Sorta Silent Saturday – Picture Dump Edition

Careful for your dial-up internets (JK), because this post is picture HEAVY! Gotta get my vacation photos out there somewhere. If you’re looking for captions, you may or may not have to hover over the photos.

Here we go!

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Bye, L.A.!

Read on. Run on.
Cassie

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1/11/17: Whatever Wednesday

As of 6:30 PM tonight, I am on vacation. Technically, I finished work at 5:00, but Dino-kid had dance class tonight. And going to dance class, although only a half hour long, is a feat in and of itself. It is work. Wonderful work, but work nonetheless.

I don’t know if I feel like I’m on vacation yet, but I think it is sorely needed. I love my job. I love my life. But it’s probably time for a breather. I’m still feeling pretty lousy about my ankle sprain, and I just.want.to.run. But I don’t run, and then I sabotage pretty much everything. It’s a vicious cycle, and I’ve got to change it.

For my Wednesday round-up of whatever, I’m focusing on being kind to myself. So I was pleased to see this article in my inbox from Minneapolis Running. (Lots of hearts for MPLS Running, btw.) How to overcome a setback. I think that verbiage is important. Get control, have a plan, gain perspective. And lots of good stuff in between.

This is a good reminder of why we should take care of ourselves.

Aaaand, I made some awesome purchases recently, and they all arrived in the mail today.

Two of them were apparel. A TeeTurtle shirt with my fave lady. And an amazingly comfortable SparkleSkirt. Can’t wait to get running and represent HRC.

Tough to get a good picture that didn’t include toddler elbows and such, but I tried. I’ll have better ones in the future.

Okay. Like I said. Vacation. Hoping to update the ol’ blog during California time, but if doesn’t, I’m sure you’ll understand. And you probably won’t even notice I’m gone. 😉

Read on. Run on.
Cassie

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12/30/16: Friday Favorites

Mojo, oh, mojo!
Where did you go-jo? I don’t
know how to find you.

This lame-sauce haiku came to me in my brief attempt to express my current feelings and motivation level. I’m definitely down in the dumps, and the post-holiday blues are piled right on top.

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I mean, this really sums up post-Christmas feels, doesn’t it?

January will be here next week, though, all fresh and shiny! I definitely have some goals that I’m working out right now, and I look forward to sharing them here.

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One of my intentions for the new year is to have more conscious time with my girl. Today was my day off, so we went for a lunch/games date.

We are getting ready for our mid-January vacation, and I am still in slight denial about not running the Star Wars Half. The passing of Carrie Fisher has made this a particularly crushing blow for me, as I was privy to the information that she will be on the finisher medals. Life is funny, and not always in a good way.

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Beauty in and out. She was my princess growing up, and she is my daughter’s princess. And badass General as well.

Holidays were good. We are so blessed with love and family and friends. I can’t remind myself of that enough.

I’m looking forward to 2017 being THE year. I don’t know why it feels different. Maybe I think that every year. But 2016 kind of felt like a gear-up, get-shit-in-line, lets-get-ready-to-go kind of year (if you forget about that pesky train-went-off-the-tracks injury a couple weeks ago). I achieved things I didn’t think I could. I feel happier, even when my brain is trying to make me not happy. I feel more at peace than I have in a long time.

Are you making goals? Resolutions? I would love to hear them.

Read on. Run on.
Cassie

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11/14/16: Manic Monday

H’okay. So. I’m here. I can’t pinpoint exactly what makes me run (or not run) right off the metaphorical tracks. I don’t know why I suddenly go silent here. I really do like writing, and I like having a place where I track my progress, or even my lack thereof.

But like I said recently, I’m not gonna dwell on these absences. I’m going to get back up and keep moving.

With that, today is the first day of Another Mother Runner’s Stride Through the Holidays! Benefiting Heart Strides! I am so excited for this fun 5-week plan. I’m coming down to crunch time for my half marathon, and I want to put myself in a prepared and positive space. Especially when there has been so much negativity in the air.

Regardless of your political beliefs and affiliations, I think everyone can agree this past week has been volatile. Frightening. Filled with uncertainty and turmoil. We are such a deeply polarized country at a time when we need to be united. I truly hope our next president is able to be successful and serve the diverse group of people who live in this country. To wish anything else upon him would be wishing for the failure of our country.

On a personal level, I wish you kindness, and I hope you put kindness into this world. Shouting and finger-pointing and violence and hate…those don’t serve to unite us or change minds. Instead, they deepen the chasm that exists in this “us versus them” country.

And on a very personal note, last week left me feeling broken in many ways. Not necessarily because of the results themselves but because of the aftermath. Because of this, I have made a choice to focus more on my blog and limit other forms of social media exposure, particularly to Facebook.

It might sound confusing. “Taking a break” from Facebook and focusing on my blog? I’ll make it work for me. It’s just too easy to fall down the rabbit hole of posts showing up in my newsfeed, to watch people bicker through their keyboards and smartphone screens…and even though I wasn’t involved, I was letting it affect me in unhealthy ways. So I decided to take a deep breath and focus on other things. Reading. Running. Crafting. Getting outside. And of course, playing with my kiddo.

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Warm quilt. Book. Lovely.

Well, my Manic Monday posts are usually a little less lengthy. Let’s get to the good stuff.

Relating to my social media rant, Active.com had an article on social media and the negative effects it can have on runners. As a back-of-the-pack runner who is often tough on herself, it’s far too easy to compare myself to others. I can come off a run feeling good and then feel disappointed after I see someone else’s far faster pace. But, I need to remember…”Ultimately, we have to run for ourselves.” Preach it, Active.

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Early morning colors.

I love listening to podcasts while I run. Mainly ones that focus on running. Currently in my rotation? Another Mother Runner, Mind Full, and The Runner’s World Show and Human Race.

But I’m always excited to find some more.
-Women’s Running featured a post on the 3 Best Podcasts for Building Mental Strength (something I’m totally into improving)
-Active.com gave a nice round-up of podcasts, and most of them aren’t directly related to running. Hmm. I might have to try a few of these.

Alright. Have a lovely day, you beautiful humans.

Read on. Run on.
Cassie

P.S. I’ve been crushing on Kate McKinnon for some time now, and the opening of SNL this past weekend maybe sorta made me ugly cry. Hallelujah.

 

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11/4/16: Friday Favorites

Sometimes, you’re on top of the world (or at least at a good vantage point to see far across the land). You are pumped and proud and happy and things are better than okay.

Sometimes, you are stuck in bed with the covers pulled up over you head (or at least the metaphorical version: in a bleak and desolate corner of your mind where you can’t even see two feet in front of the haze that has formed around you). You are a mixture of numb and sad and blah that leaves you confused and feeling not-so-okay.

Sometimes, you experience these things within days or hours of each other, and it leaves you drained and wondering what is wrong with you. How can someone who has things going well for them possibly feel this way? Then guilt settles right in, too. It’s a vicious cycle.

I feel like I apologize often for lapses in blogging. And I can pile on the excuses, but those make me feel guilty, too. From now on, I’m just going to assume any blips in my writing are part of life. I’ll be here when I’m here. I’ll make myself accountable to this writing/running thing when I’m able. And all the other times, well…I’ll try to sneak in an Instagram post or two to feel a little more connected.

So on a day when I just don’t feel like I have any updates or anything good to say about my current running regimen (which has been, y’know, nonexistent this week), I’ll tell you something you already know.

My girl is my ultimate Friday Favorite. And making holidays, like Halloween, special for her is one of my ultimate joys in life. She is growing up so fast, and I want her to remember that her mom tried really hard for her. I want her to know it wasn’t always perfect, and Mom worked full-time and couldn’t spend time with her nearly as often as they both wanted. And Mom sometimes needed a half hour of playing Yahtzee on her phone after work.

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Halloween night at dance class

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BB-8 and R2-D2

But I want her to be able to say, “My mom loved me and did what she could to make things special in her own way.”

So I’ll ultimately focus on that goal each and every day.

Read on. Run on.
Cassie

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